16 May 2006

Monday Manic



I had a self revelation over the weekend as to why I find Monday the most painful day in the week. My theory is that Monday represents the dichotomy that everybody in America experiences every work week. Monday is the "reality" of our lives, it is the absolute truth that we all live and share in that can not be avoided..it is the pain. The weekend represents the other side, it is the vehicle that transports us to our fantasies, usually are sins...pleasure, the cocaine and alcohol induced binge we go through to escape our Monday's, our painful truths, our individual reality. Its what allows us to keep on trucking through life and deal with the harsh realization that some of us will live a very marginal existence. Gawd this is very depressing.........*As I sip a Red Russian.

But a friend sent me this link and it gave me a nice chuckle *chuckles on Mondays are my rock hammer stabs at the prison walls of reality*. My female friends like to interrogate me about my past relationships with women. I'm guessing that maybe they might be interested in me or they might be worried that I'm the next Buffalo Bill and they want to stay as far away as possible.

Blogger Disclaimer=*No, I don't sing or dance to Boy George songs, dressed like a woman holding a terrier named "Precious".

They ask for my opinion about the biggest difference between women in the Midwest vs the Mid-Atlantic and I would have to say three distinct characteristics stand out to me.
1. MA' chicas are smart as hell. There's no dumbing down going on in this part of the country. These chicas are independent and proud of it. Viva La Female Revolucion.
2. MA chicas do a great job of putting themselves first. They have a excellent F.U. component to their personalities. They will put you on blast if you cross them in a heartbeat. MW's are the Polands of femaledom. They will let men blitzkrieg their lives all for the sake of having a marriage and partner.
3. MA chicas work out on the regular. The gym is the third temple of worship right behind career and church. No sloppy buttocks in the MA which I have to say is *Wait for It* one of the greatest assets the region has to offer. But look at this video and tell me if this is the secret I've been looking for, my DaVinci Code for posterior. It would help explain so much. *Takes another sip of Red Russian*

12 Comments:

At 11:07 AM, Blogger La'Tina said...

11K for an Ass@!!That is out of control!!! But whatever to make her happy. Again, I am finding it hard to concentrate looking at this woman's ass on the sofa.
I hate Monday's, I try to call in once a month on a Monday just to keep myself happy. But you are totally right, the dichotomy b/w Jeckyl & Hyde.

 
At 2:22 PM, Blogger KassyK said...

Agreed--Mondays suck and show us time and time again our pathetic existences working 9-5 in a worthless job (unless your job MEANS something and in that case you goooo on with your bad self on Mondays)...maybe if I had an endless supply of loot--Monday would be the day I did good things for the world like getting in a gilded helicopter and throwing cash down at poor people...Or maybe thats just bc someone would f-kin do that for me already!! Anyways...enough about not having money...That girl does have a really nice ass...

 
At 12:40 AM, Blogger Asian Mistress said...

Where in God's name did you find that picture?

I guess the old saying about how they grow 'em in the midwest applies here? Or not...

 
At 1:02 AM, Blogger O-FACE said...

Thicky---Lmaoooooooo. I know look at it!!!!!

Kassy--Hover over and throw money down at me anyday...Throw a friend or too as well.

A-Mistress--Thats what i'm trying to figure out...Is it the water???

 
At 5:00 PM, Blogger The Lily said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 5:03 PM, Blogger Rebecca said...

Most of the MW women I know have an overdeveloped FU component. I think they got bored of cornfields and decided the world and everyone in it just sucked. Just to dispute the water theory.

 
At 5:07 PM, Blogger The Lily said...

1. Way to make Mondays ever more depressing.

2. This is a bandwagon I never imagined that my gender would jump. Lovely. Let's hope Twiggy doesn't come back in style.

 
At 7:13 PM, Blogger O-FACE said...

Becca---Must be Chicagonise or C-Busians (Columbus)...I can smell it a mile away.......Maybe they were contaminated by the MA's???

CBelle--Yes, I secretly work part time for Merk, Eli Lilly, Astra Zeneca, Genentech, Esai, Bristol Meyers, Roche, SmithKline, Johnson and Johnson...I have a penchant for making people depressed. Its my gift and my curse......

 
At 10:54 PM, Blogger Moxie said...

Hey, I resemble that remark! You make these 3 points as if they are absolute positive points - yet nice of you to be so femme supportive.

As a "MW" I'll say feminism killed chivalary ~ which sucks for all of us. I miss nice guys and most poor guys don't even know how they should act anymore. Moreover, #1 dumbing down has worked quite well for me in many situations out here. Playing dumb, yet always being smart, can get a girl a lot further than you think. #2 I do put myself first (as do most of the MW chicas I know) but, a little sacrifice for the hubby and family is a good thing. I will concur, MWs tend to marry too early before they have a firm foundation of what they want for themselves which usually comes form life experience. #3 My ass rocks! ok, kidding aside - many of the MWs tend to lean to the wide side, I'll give ya that one.

btw, the chickie in the pick has that same damn tan line I get when you forget to pick up your legs in the tanning bed. I love it! Good post O. you pretty well got us pegged.

 
At 5:00 PM, Blogger VP of Dior said...

your 3 descriptions are spot on. mid-atlantic girls know how to run things, but aren't as annoyingly aggressive as some northerners or as passive/aggressive as southerners. it's the whole "northern efficiency southern charm, blah blah, JFK" thing. (no offense to girls from other parts of the country. it's just how i see it).

 
At 6:45 PM, Blogger O-FACE said...

Moxie----My ass rocks!---Lmao...quote of the year....Your also my hero...till i find another picture of a brazilian model......

VP- Yeah your right...You guys have that Hillary Clinton quality....just so centrists.....till the men screw up, then were at your mercy....

 
At 12:06 AM, Blogger Wendy said...

well, since I am part Latina, I don't have to worry about all this nonsense about nonasses.

 

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